The 2021 Christmas Funk Thread

Dan Randall

Western Thunderer
After taking his seat on a plane, a young guy is surprised to see a pigeon, strapped into the seat beside him. After take off, the man asks the Flight Attendant for a coffee, but the pigeon yells over him, "Bring me a whiskey, NOW!". A few moments later, she returns with a glass of whiskey, but no coffee. "Hey, dumbass!", the pigeon shouts, after downing his drink, "Another whiskey!". The Attendant hurried once more, to fetch the pigeon his drink, but again, forgot the coffee. Upset at being ignored, the guy decided to follow the pigeon's example. "Hey!", he shouted at the Attendant, "Bring me coffee, NOW!". At that moment, the cockpit door burst open and the co-pilot came storming towards them. "We've had enough of you two", he said and with that, he dragged them to the nearest door, opened it and threw the pair of them out of the plane from 33,000ft. As they plummeted towards the ground, the pigeon gave the guy a respectful nod and said, "You know, that was a really gutsy thing to do, especially for someone that can't fly".....
 

simond

Western Thunderer
Once upon a time there were Penguins at both poles... and one of the Polar Bears was able to remove the silver foil.

about 20 years ago, my lad (who is currently cooking a lamb curry for a dinner party this evening) spent a happy hour or so at the neighbour’s watching cartoon channel or some such that we did not have. I wandered over to bring him home & thank the neighbours (who are still dear friends, my, they are patient) and found this three or four year old COVERED in chocolate.

I enquired as to the source. Apparently a lovely biscuit wrapped in silver paper and with lots of chocolate

“Oh”, says I, “ it must have been a Penguin”

“don’t be silly daddy, it was a chocolate biscuit”
 

michael mott

Western Thunderer
I listened to an interview this evening on CBC after the reading of the story of "The Shepherd" it was about the restoration of the Mosquito by some folk in Sydney British Columbia and immediately thought of you Heather, I'm not sure but you have probably seen it already.

Merry Christmas.

Michael
 

Heather Kay

Western Thunderer
That was lovely, Michael, thanks.

Mosquitos are a bit late for my 1940 cutoff, although the prototype was flying in that year. Nice to see one in its natural environment. I was surprised at how cramped to cockpit was.
 

oldravendale

Western Thunderer
Joe and Richard were playing golf at their local links. As they reached the ninth hole a funeral cortege passed along the adjacent road. Joe bowed his head and removed his cap. Richard was quite overcome - "It's wonderful to see someone with such respect for those who have passed" he said. Joe replied "Well, we were married for 35 years....."
 
Top